Monday was my last day at work. It was surreal. Of course, I didn't have time to get done everything I would have liked to, didn't leave things (documentation, my desk, all the program knowledge I have in my head) in the shape I would have liked to. There just was never going to be enough time, so there certainly wasn't time or space for emotional good-byes, though I was emotional about it. Typically, when leaving a job, the good-byes feel less permanent, even if they're not. There is usually at least a possibility we will meet again. But this time, since I'm not just leaving a company but leaving an industry and geographic location, it's possible I will not see many of my co-workers again. The finality of this last day struck me, but I didn't really have the time or space to process or confront it. Instead I did the best I could, was grateful for my send-offs and good co-workers, and promised to keep in touch (on Facebook, or via email, or with pictures of the girls, or with one final last happy hour).
"Mirabella," I said, "when we get to Tennessee, do you think I should look for a new job?"
"No, I think taking care of us should be your job," she said.
"But who will pay me?" I asked.
"We'll have to talk to Daddy about that," she said.
Daniel made us dinner and had a bottle of champagne chilling for after the kids went to bed.
So now, at the conclusion of my first week on the job, some initial lessons learned from my first few days of stay-at-home motherhood:
1. There are still not enough hours in the day. No matter whether I work at home, for home or from home, I still can't do it all.
2. I sometimes feel I am constantly bent at the waist, picking up toys, pillows, what have you, and at the end of the day the house still isn't clean.
3. I haven't properly done my hair at all in the last week.
4. Practicing yoga with children is funny, but not necessarily effective.
5. It's much harder to stay on top of an email inbox when you're never in front of a desk.
I know this first week wasn't the way it will always be. The excitement-- theirs and mine-- may fade. The list of things we have to do will impose on the want-to's. My motivation to be super mom will come and go. But I do think it's worth noting that the first few days on the job were, for the most part, awesome.